TOUGH GIRLS

TOUGH GIRLS WANTED! Yeah, you heard me right.  Relentless Volleyball Club is looking for some Tough Girls!  Think you can cut it? Do you think you are tough enough?  Bring it! 

You can however leave the “tough girl” act at home. We are not looking for bullies, thugs, black leather, guns, knives and tattoos.  Being a Tough Girl is not about some manufactured swagger or bad attitude.  Being a Tough Girl is not about being callous, cruel and cold hearted or pushing other people around. Tough Girls are tender-hearted, they are kind and courteous. Tough Girls are compassionate and they even cry.  Tough Girls can also deal with disappointment, challenges and failure without disintegrating into a sobbing pile of goo. 

Some of the toughest Tough Girls that I know are my mom, my grandmothers, my wife and my daughters.  To the best of my knowledge none were ever a part of a gang. (However, they do like to shoot guns, ride motorcycles, hunt and at least once owned a pair of black leather pants.)  But that is not what makes them Tough Girls.  They have always made way for others and put others ahead of themselves.  They are some of the most compassionate, kind and caring people that I know.  But if you think disappointments, struggles and hard times were going to knock them down or knock them out, you got another thing coming!

Becoming a Tough Girl starts with understanding the life is not just about you and it is not always going to go your way. You will not always get what you want, the way you want, when you want or even at all. Do Tough Girls have individual dreams, aspirations and goals? Of course they do! They also realize that sometimes you need to fight for them. These things don’t come easy. Tough Girls realize that success in life is earned, not just given away. Sometimes you fight for a goal and lose. Sometimes someone else just takes what you are fighting for away from you. Sometimes you get knocked out of the fight by injury or other tragedy. And, though it may sound contradictory, sometimes another person gets what you want without seeming to have to work as hard for it! 

Tough Girls get frustrated, disappointed and even cry some times. But they don’t quit because things get tough. There are situations when you have to fight through the tears and disappointment. As one of my daughters likes to say you just have to “Suck it up Buttercup!” Tough Girls are not perfect at being Tough Girls either. Yes, sometimes Tough Girls try to be tough and fail. But they don’t let that failure become permanent. Tough Girls get nervous and fearful. But Tough Girls have the courage to face those fears. Courage is not the absence of fear, it is the ability to look fear straight in the eye and not let it stop you or beat you. Courage is the ability to overcome fear.  

So how can sports help you to become a Tough Girl? The consequences of sport are primarily self-created. However, I believe that the inevitable ups and downs of competitive sports are a great training ground for life. Sports provide a context not only for physical fitness and fun but also to allow yourself to learn and gain some mental toughness and resilience.  Life will throw at you real hardship, real disappointment, tragedy, challenges and loss.  For many young people, they have already experienced this.  When these things come, we need to have the ability to continue to persevere and to move forward with resolve and heart.  We need to be able to stare fear, uncertainty, challenge and disappointment in the face and not quit, not give up.  We need to be Tough!

So you think you’re tough? 

 

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